Mark Sargent proves the Earth is flat!

NASAs image of the Earth compared to Sargents.

John Loos

NASA’s image of the Earth compared to Sargents.

Outrage caused as a well known flat earther, Mark Sargent, finally has evidence proving that the Earth is flat. Mark Sargent, 53, has been doing experiments for years now trying to prove to everyone that the Earth is flat. In a recent experiment, Sargent tied an expensive camera to a weather balloon. As the weather balloon was flying into the atmosphere, Sargent had the camera constantly uploading the footage to the cloud where everything is stored. This is a major difference between Sargents images, and the ones released from NASA.           

Sargent managed to get an absorbent amount of supporters on his discovery. Sargent and his supporters had peaceful protests held all around the country. The motive was to have the government admit that they lied. Fortunately, these protests seemed to work.

 

Biden Addresses the nation. (John Loos)

President Joe Biden gave a speech on Thursday saying that the evidence is true and that the Earth is flat. Biden addressed the nation from a conference room at NASA saying, “Due to certain circumstances; the true shape of the Earth has been hidden from the public. On behalf of my administration, I would like to publicly apologize for hiding this. To anyone confused or shocked by this, I give you my condolences and promise to be truthful going forward. The picture behind me is an accurate representation of the shape of the Earth.” 

This will have a major effect on the general population of BASH. All students, starting in the 2022-2023 school year, are required to take astronomy. This is an essential measure, approved by the school board, that will help clear up confusion and help everyone understand what the shape of the Earth is. Many students are taking to twitter to express their anger towards the government for lying about this for so long. One student wrote, “I can’t believe they would hide this from us?” Another student who attends BASH replied,  “If they are hiding something as simple as the Earth from us, what else are they hiding?” 

People are outraged by the evidence because NASA is a government run space corporation. This is currently making the general public not trust the government as much. Many people want corporations like NASA to be privately funded rather than  government funded. This way they would (in theory) have no reason to hide anything from the public. “There is a barrier between what people in the government know and what the population knows. We need to break down that barrier,” Sargent wrote on Twitter.

This is a very confusing time to be alive and there is mass confusion among the general population. It would be a great idea to take time and research the new shape of the Earth and know why everything played out the way it did.

Note: All events are fake.